Last night I taught a lovely workshop on Healthy Relationships to a group of adults with disabilities. While brainstorming a list of Healthy and Unhealthy Behaviors in relationships, one young man yelled out “Sex is an unhealthy behavior!” The room got quiet and then a couple other adults said, “Yes, yes, sex is an unhealthy behavior.” I couldn’t believe it – but I knew this to be a common feeling among folks with disabilities. Many people with disabilities, and actually many people without disabilities, were taught growing up that “sex is bad”. At that moment, our conversation shifted to talk about that statement. We chatted about the word “pleasure” for a while – a new word for most participants. We talked about the importance of consenting to have sex in relationships. We also talked about the fact that sex is an adult activity, and they are adults. Hmm….I think the parents and staff in the room were holding their breath for these few minutes.

People with disabilities are sexually assaulted way more
often than people without disabilities. Let’s talk about these topics so that everyone knows what healthy and unhealthy behaviors are in a relationship. While presenting at the MN State Autism Conference last spring, a young woman with autism shared with me, “Thank you for teaching us this stuff. No one wants to talk to us about this it.”

Find out more about our work to support you in talking
about “this stuff” by visiting our webpage: www.sexualityforallabilities.com or contacting us at katie@madhatterwellness.com.  You’ll find resources to support self-advocates, support professionals and parents & caregivers.

Katie Thune will present at the MNCCD Health and Wellness Conference on October 3rd. www.mnccd.org/conference